Klopfenpop

Coiffenchop

A New Austrian-born flamboyant hair dresser and stylist from the post-dystopian era of New York Prime. He owns his own store front and is a known practitioner of several types of future karate. Coiffenchop is believed to be an agent for the Noe-Pangean shadow government.

Sir Klopfenlot

A third-string benchwarmer on the New England Knights American football team. After one of their games, the entire team was transported to Camelot by Merlin the wizard to help free King Arthur and the knights of the round table from the Cave of Glass where they had been trapped by the evil enchantress Queen Morgana.

While there, team quarterback Arthur King and the players who were on the field at the time the football game had ended posed as King Arthur and the knights of the round table while searching for the 12 keys of truth needed to free the true Knights. Each of the keys can only be touched by a particular one of the 12 interim knights or it is lost forever.

Klopfenlot is best known for accidentally attempting the pick up the eleventh key when one of the knights dropped it on the ground thus destroying it and any chance of salvation for King Arthur and the knights of the round table.

Coughindrop

The sidekick ARNP to Dr. Ugdealer, Coughindrop is known to treat symptoms over problems and attack the low-hanging fruit of evil. His outfit clings a little tightly to him, leading to a lot of awkward conversations wherein people try to keep their eyes above his belt.

It should be noted that in a mildly interesting coincidence, the Klopfenpop in our universe, in fact, has a medical intolerance of the cough suppressant Codeine.

Hufflepop

Founder of House Hufflepop at Cockwart's Community College of Vocational Conjuration. Jawce Hufflepop was primarily considered a "cover-magus", reconstituting and variegating the magical techniques of others into personalized (but still recognizeable) sorcerous feats. His reiterative interpretations of the work of Willdemort of House Smitherin (sometimes known as the Half-Fresh Prince) and the works of Wheelbus Stenodore of House Supercommudor are especially noteworthy.

Pop’n’Lock

Notable henchman of Shredder in one of rejected preliminary pilots for the animated 1980s television show “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” Pop’n’Lock was an otter that was weaponized by Crang using a canister of Techno Global Research Industries’ mutagenic toxic waste. He is notable for his fighting style which was entirely breakdancing—not breakdance-fighting, just actual breakdancing while people attacked him.

He wore single-lense, wrap around, polarized sunglasses and a sideways, neon green baseball hat with the bill turned upward. His clothes were identical to those of Dale, the cartoon chipmunk and noted Rescue Ranger, with the addition of the aformentioned, vaguely hip-hop headwear and a digital alarm clock on a gold chain worn around his neck. The significance of the alarm clock remains unknown.

Kloppenthorpe

Sometimes known as the Diminutive Detective of Derbyshire or the Sage Sleuth of Shropshire, Klopfenthorpe is a detective in a steampunk Victorian realm within which he is a Knight of the British Empire. Sir Josias Edmont Kloppenthorpe was a boy detective in Derbyshire, single-handedly foiling the Cult of the Red Jackrabbit and bringing the serial cuddler Rolly "the Loveboy" Turtles to justice. As a teen he moved to Shropshire where he was apprenticed to the mathematician Professor Anders Stenson, from whom he learned the secrets of Cada Dia. It was during this time that he became known for his obsession with primality in mathematics and its application toward crimefighting, which led to his association with interdimensional crimefighters Professor St. John Percival Copsley Esquire, Baron Billiam Bilford Beatsworth, and Colonel Sir Jestin Hume McThreepo III. He was knighted for his brave service to England in repelling an invasion from an alternate universe alongside his stalwart comrades.

A young German billionaire DJ who frequents the rave scene of Neo-London. Known for his innovative mash ups, such as Skrillex vs The Electric Light Orchestra, he is also known as Lord Sir Clapping Pop, the ecstasy enthusiast of edinburgh. He's known to flaunt his excessive wealth in extremely petty ways, including using large euro's as business cards, sharpied with his website www.claporgetpopped.co.uk. Attributed as the catalyst of the greater European economic slump of 2024.

Young friend to Lady Godiva and raised in the same nunnery, it is commonly held that Lady Klocksentrots was the actual mother of Aelfgar, son of Leofric, Earl of Mercia.
Lacking of noble blood, Lady Klocksentrots, whose first name has been debated for centuries, was destined to be little more than a hand maiden and chambermaid to the Godivas. Through her servitude Lady Klocksentrots discovered a unique talent for playing melodies on the different sized chamber pots she emptied, until she ultimately formed a full bards quartete called "Klocksentrot" (historical members include Guenivere-bit and NES-THEE).
It was through independent festival and solstice event bookings that Lady Klocksentrots became semi-famous, espeically in the Irish Northlands.
It is rumored her name was actually Klocksentrop, but was changed to "trot" after the Lady was accused of causing a chlamydia outbreak while on a Central European tour.

A popular fueling station franchise in the barren southern region of the United States of America. They are known for their ready-to-go food products such as Klopenfritters, Klöpen-Dazs Ice Cream & the famous soy hamburger the Double Kloppa Droppa. In 2004 a ring of gas siphoners targeted 14 Klop-N-Stop fueling stations always leaving a calling card of graffiti tagged on the cement saying "Klopf-N-Popped." The suspects of the ring have never been caught in connection to the siphonings.

Klapfenpap

A dairy farmer from Wisconsin and second generation Norwegian, whose family emigrated to the US in the early years of World War II. He has a soft spot for buckwheat and brews his own moonshine. Has a rap-country fusion band named Prariebagel. He is revered in his community as the legendary Bovahkin, a once-in-a-generation hero who speaks Bovitongue, the language of cows.

David Hasselfklopf

Once a reserve actor on the popular hit TV show "Knight Rider" in the 80's, David Hasselflopf is world renowned for his thick forest of chest hair, which hosts a small community of bacteria used to treat various anal cancers. David Hasselklopf is also noted for his award-winning musical "Dusseldorf Douchebag", which is performed entirely in the same language that Hitler spoke.